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A practical arrangement

March 26, 2009

What do You Think?


Marriage based on the notion of romantic love is a modern affair, but it is not the only way…

Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, boy and girl get married. This formula for romance-based marriage is the mainstream today, providing the basis for movies, books, songs, and for almost all of us it is a lifelong dream we struggle to fulfil.

But it’s not the only way to everlasting love. The concept of an arranged marriage may sound unromantic and old-fashioned but, to those who advocate it, it is a practical arrangement that works because it does not involve unrealistic expectations.

Unromantic as this sounds, divorce rates and commonplace matrimonial strife suggest that the ideal of an ever-lasting marriage built on romantic love is largely just that – an ideal that all too often ends in disappointment and divorce.

The divorce rate in the US, for example, is around 50 per cent, and in some European countries it is higher. Hong Kong’s divorce rate is lower, but reportedly fast catching up. According to the Census and Statistics Department, the number of divorces grew six-fold between 1981 and 2002.

In India, on the other hand, arranged marriages remain the norm, and it has one of the lowest divorce rates in the world at about 1 per cent.

Alice Yu Pik-lai, a counsellor at ReSource the Counselling Centre, thinks there is some wisdom behind this, and that arranged marriages can be rewarding if parents arrange them responsibly with a view to the children’s needs.

(Abridged version. Full article, written by Sara Yin, appeared in YoungPost on Feb 9th 2009)

Give us YOUR VIEWS in the box below…

5 Comments leave one →
  1. ALI permalink
    April 1, 2009 11:47 pm

    Maybe teenagers can’t distinguish ‘love’ and ‘adore’ well. They fall in love easily and break up soon. And they are even proud of having lots of ex-boyfriend/ex-girlfriend! Maybe their attitude to love affairs should be corrected so they become more serious in this issue.
    There are a great number of divorced middle-aged people. Maybe the meaning of freedom is wrongly interpret by people and they mistake ‘willfulness’ as ‘pursuit of freedom’. TERRIBLE!

    • Cheese permalink
      May 16, 2009 11:07 am

      Yes, I agree, teenagers don’t exactly know what love is yet, but they only find out after they get married. I think that teenagers shouldn’t get involved with romances too early because they may get distracted from their studies. Furthermore, nowadays, teenagers don’t know what the issue of love is, they think it’s love when a person of the opposite gender is being friendly to them, maybe it is just a case of being friends.

  2. Benedict permalink
    March 28, 2009 11:15 pm

    I think marriage is only for people after they finish university and college, because if you fall in love too fast it may disrupt their education. So I advise parents that have a son/daughter that is a teenager for you to keep an eye on them!

  3. Elaine permalink
    March 26, 2009 5:19 pm

    I think teenage boy and teenage girl fall in love is not good.I think they can do some good things.
    e.g.grow trees,help the poor people,learning some things……
    I think we can do more good things!

    • Benedict permalink
      March 28, 2009 11:17 pm

      I think so too as if they do recreational stuff such as e.g.grow trees, helping the poor people it might pull them off love, marriage, sex and other stuff you do when you are older.

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